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2002 09 ??: Dreamed I was trying to sleep, but Carolyn's kids were making a lot of noise, so I went outside to sleep on the sidewalk. This friendly cat came, jumped up on my shoulder and sat there. I stayed real still so as not to scare the cat away. Then the cat became a beautiful young girl and I was afraid to move because I didn't want to lose her. And then we went to have breakfast and she said she didn't know who she could trust. I said "You can trust your teachers and yourself." She said she wasn't beautiful, and I said "You have a beautiful, beautiful spirit." I feeling lots of emotion. Then they took me to this small breakfast table and I was feeling kind of sleepy and spacey. This one woman guided me to sit down. I was in a blissful, samadhi state and then I started to laugh out loud and I wondered what everyone would think of me. Then the alarm went off.
2002 11 07: (AMMA DREAM) Dreamed I was going up this river with Dad in a boat and we came to this building where they were having a small Amma event. The room was paneled in wood and was kind of old fashioned. We all stood up when Amma came in and I felt this wonderful wave of devotion and love arise. She sat at this table and Prasad was also there. There was space available so I moved to sit at the table. At fist Amma talked about this form that people needed to have and then she said don't worry about it. At this point She had on this very garish, heavy blue & gold eye makeup like the wings of a butterfly. She spoke dharma in her native language & English & then She wanted us to hold hands. Prasad and this other woman reached out for Amma's hands. The other woman pulled her hands back so I put my hands out and held Amma's hands. I started to cry a little. She reached over the table to hug me and with lots of emotion and tears I said "Please make the pain stop! It hurts so much!" (I was referring to my everpresent anxiety and sense of separation). Then I felt and saw this powerful energy burst inside of me like a BIG emotional knot bursting open. I could see the explosion, it was powerful, but not bright. Subdued colors. It woke me up and then I was floating in this peaceful state for a few moments.
2002 12 17: Dreamed I was at this Dharma teaching by a very high Tibetan Lama. I was sitting on the floor. This monk invited me to lean back and he asked if he could rub my shoulders. I said "Sure!".
2002 12 19: Had this amazing series of complex lucid dreams after I got back from the bathroom. Near the beginning I floated out of my body and was moving around the ceiling. I seemed to be completely lucid and I was making a point of consciously looking at my hands. At another point I laid down on this big circular rock that was supported by bearings so it could roll over. The idea was to lie on the rock in bliss for billions of years while it flipped over once every year or hundred years. I was feeling blissful and enlightened throughout the whole dream.
2002 12 22: (At the Land Celebration). Dreamed I was flying over the fields near the house where I was sleeping and I was hearing the John Denver song "I Want To Live" and I was totally blissed out by the spirit of the song and feeling very enlightened while flying over the beautiful green fields.
2003 02 25: (AMMA DREAM) Dreamed I was with some spiritual friends (Dave C, Pam M & A. T.) in the basement at my former house on Larchmont Ct in northern VA. One of them was showing me this sadhana book they got from Ammachi. The book had directions and pictures to meditate on. After a few moments I said "Hold it; you're not supposed to show us your sadhana and mantra!" Then they closed the book. Then we walked into the main room of my basement and Ammachi was sitting on my yellow meditation cushion. I asked Her if I could use it and Amma said "Oh. OK. No problem." She acted very ordinary and cool. Then I realized what I was doing! I said "Oh, Amma! I'm sorry. Please sit there. Don't worry about it." Then I did some bows to Her right knee and touched Her right knee like you would touch a Holy person. I was feeling very contrite that I asked Amma to get off my cushion! She got on the cushion and turned around to look at everyone in the room. Then I was just looking at Amma and feeling how amazing it was to be so close to Her. Hey eyes were big and beautiful and I felt love and tears inside me. It seemed I was the only one who was so overjoyed to see Amma. She seemed so ordinary but I deeply felt She was a true Avatar (incarnation of God).
2003 03 06: (AMMA DREAM) Dreamed I was in this wierd indoor subway transportation system. At one point, I saw one of the train cars came loose and was grabbed by a chain and flung against the wall. I was kind of scared and glad that it didn't get thrown toward me. I walked away and took an unauthorized shortcut by grabbing a chain and swung down to a lower level. Some little security munchkin drawf saw me and told on me. I was nervous I would be caught so I turned my shirt inside out so they wouldn't recognize me. They caught me and told me I had to go see Mother (Amma). I went to see her and She was in bed happily answering a stream of questions from people. When it was my turn She held up a map book and said "Always carry your map with you. It's correct and everything is in there." Her head was toward my left side and near Her head seemed to be an open window with sunlight. I was a little contrite and said "Yeah, you're right Amma. I need to carry that map."
2003 05 25: Amma Dream: Dreamed I was at this wierd bowling ally where at the end of the lane was this glass beaker that you had to bounce the ball off of so it would arc into some water pools behind it. As I was getting ready to bowl I noticed that the fingerholes were too tight, so I thought to myself "This is a dream, I'll just make the fingerholes larger." As I realized this was a dream, I looked at my hands and came fully awake (lucid) in the dream. Then I thought "I want to go see Amma." Then the bowling alley faded and I was srrounded by some dim lights and swirling shapes and I was feeling for Her presence.
2003 06 22 AMMA DREAM: Dreamed I was with this woman who was an Amma devotee & organizer. She had just finished up one retreat and we were in a van to go another retreat. Her Mom was also in the van. Later in the dream I met one of Amma's senior disciples who was awake (enlightened) and had a PhD.
2003 08 17 AMMA DREAM: Dreamed I was at an Amma event in the main hall and I had to speak with one of the organizers about mowing the grass or some task. I was walking around looking for the right person and asking people. I finally found the right person (Ann) and we conferred for a few moments. Then it was near time for Amma to come into the hall. The atmosphere became very electric! Many people were strongly anticipating Her entry; people crying, beaming and in rapture. Amma came in & sat down but She didn't look like Amma. She looked like a man and her gaze was cool, a little serious and intense. She slowly looked around at everyone. Then She leaned over backwards in her chair for a few seconds and sat back up. I was totally in love & bliss. She was wearing some kind of hozizontal stripped dress or robe.
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